4 Days in the Life of the TOS PPLS
by animeice335
Summary: 4 days spent with Lloyd, Colette, Zelos, Raine, Kratos, Mithos, Presea, Genis, Sheena, and Regal, with a few others as well. VERY random, and VERY funny. Know you will like it, read and review please.


Day 1

"Whats everyone want to do today?" Lloyd asked.

"I KNOW I KNOW! I WANT TO GET IN A HOTTUB WITH LLOYDIE!" Colette cried, and she started to drool.Lloyd shivered. "Need help Lloyd?" Genis asked. He went over to Colette and gave her a cup of soft serve ice cream. "Whats that supposed to do?"

"Shes stupid remember?"  
"Yeah but...?"  
"Look" 

Colette was now gagging holding her throat.

"What happened?"  
"Shes choking"  
"On soft serve ice cream?"  
"Shes stupid"  
"That stupid?"   
"Yes, that stupid."

"Fine, what does everybody else want to do?"  
"SHHHHHH IM STUDYING MY 500 YEAR OLD DOG !" Raine said from the corner.

Zelos walked up to Lloyd while he was using his hair straightner. "I was thinking about going and picking up some hot dudes at the mall. WHO WANTS TO COME WITH ME!"

Mithos popped out of nowhere. "I DO I DO!"

"NO!"  
"Why?"   
"Becuz last time i got kicked out of my favorite gay bar becuz they all thought you were a little girl"  
"Just becuz i like to wear blue dresses, play with barbies,and make out with my ken doll, doesnt mean im a girl."  
"Yes it does, you dont make out with a ken doll. You make out with a Nick Lachey doll, DUH!"

Mithos started crying and ran away. Zelos walked out of the room, slapping Lloyds rear before he left. Loyd jumped and let out a "peep" sound.

Suddenly Pronyma appeared. "Guess what?"  
"Your a man?" Genis stated.  
"No, you idiot. Everyone knew that years ago. Pshh."   
"What then?"  
"YUAN AND KRATOS ARE GETTING MARRIED!!"  
"YUAN IS GOING TO BE MY DAD? I WONT ALLOW IT!" Lloyd yelled.  
Pronyma looked at him with a"your so stupid" look.  
"No, hes going to be your mom."   
"Oh, well then thats ok."  
Pronyma then started hovering. "Goodbye idiots" She then zoomed upward, forgetting there was a ceiling, she rammed it with her head, giving her a concusion, cuasing her to fall unconsious onto Raine.

"You destroyed my dog ! YOU WILL PAY!" Raine started repeatedly whacking the knockedout pronyma with her staff.

Colette then ran into the room holding a pair of Lloyds trousers like a trophy. "OHMYGOD!!!!!! I FOUND LLOYDS PANTS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"Colette i told you to stay out of my clothes!!" lloyd yelled beginning to chase after Colette who was screaming like a retarded fangirl. They ran out of the room.

Presea got up from the couch. She had been watching a program called. "How to skin a boar with your teeth." 

"Im going to go outside and kill little animals now." Presea walked over to the front door and went out, sadly catching one of her pigtails in the door when she closed it. Genis heard the word "Dam" muttered from outside.

Colette came flying into the room flying around in a circle above the couch with a pair of red boxers on her head. "OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!! I FOUND A PAIR OF LLOYDS BOXERS!!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" 

"Dammit, i cant reach the doorknob in this position." Presea stated from beyond the door. Colette heard this and looked at the pink pigtail sticking out of the doorcrack. "YAAAAAAAY! THAT IS THE PRETTIEST COLOR IVE EVER SEENED!!!!!"

Colette flew over to the door and started yanking on preseas hair. A whole range of loud and obscene curses came from the other side. 

"INCREDIBLE! THIS HAIR IS REMARKABLE! I MUST HAVE IT!" Raine too started pulling on the poor pigtail.

Regal came into the room. "Who wants to touch my hot bod." Sheena jumped in from the two story window. "ME!" She then jumped on top of Regal and they started making out like wild animals on the floor. Genis cringed at this so he threw a sheet on top of them. Then, for entertainment, he started whacking them with the ball on his kendama.

Lloyd walked into the room dragging a bag. "Genis, where can i hide this."He said in a whisper not wanting colette to hear him. "Hmm..." Genis walked over and took a magic marker out of his pocket and wrote. "Not filled with Lloyds clothes" on it.  
"Are you sure that will work"  
"Colette was choking on soft serve ice cream a minute ago...yes, im sure."  
"I wanna make sure no one ever looks in here though."  
"...ok"

He scribbled it out and wrote "Things from under zelos's bed"   
Lloyd shivered. "Now i think im too scared too open this up..."

There was suddenly a loud ripping sound. Everyone froze. Sheena and Regal slowly started getting up off the floor. Colette had suddenly started flying around in circles again. "YAAAAAAAY! I WIN!!!" She exclaimed holding the pink pigtail.

The front door slowly opened. "Thats it. You all #& die." She stated calmly bringing up her axe. Lloyd screamed like a little girl. "This is almost as scary as when Zelos came out of the closet."

"We have to think of something...I KNOW! Colette, if you stop Presea, ill give you all of Lloyds Pants!"

Colette turned and had a face of retard who had just gotten a sock for christmas. "YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!...wait...i want his underwear too." 

"Um...sure"  
"And his lingerie"  
"He has lingerie?"

Everyone, including Presea turned to Lloyd and stared at him. Lloyd sweatdropped. "Well, Zelos is the one who gave them all to me...their pretty comfortable." 

Everyone started gagging. Except for Colette who was having disturbing fantasies of Lloyd. Her drool was making a puddle on the floor.

Presea turned around and went toward the door. "Im going for a walk."

"Me too!" Sheena said.  
"I will also!" Regal was right behind her.  
"...I think i shall go disect a squirrel." Raine said folloing them.  
"A walk really does sound good." Genis ran out closing the door. 

Lloyd stood in the same position, afraid to move. Since Colette could break out of her trance any moment. Sadly, Pronyma woke up. "What happened...my head feels like the time it did when i went to that gay bar with Zelos..." She exclaimed lazily walking over to the front door and leaving.

Colette stopped drooling. "OH MY GAAAAAAWWWD!!!!! WERE ALL ALONE LLOYDIE!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!

The people who had left earlier to go for a walk felt a little guilty for leaving when they heard Lloyds blood curdling screams. 

Day 2

Genis poked his head through the door. "Is anybody here?" Lloyd came into the living room waving. "Hi Genis!"

Genis slowly came in. "Um...Hi Lloyd...wheres Colette?" "Shes getting me a drink. The one advantage of obsession over me is that i can make her do whatever i want, so its not entirely bad." 

"...go ahead and just keep thinking that Lloyd..."  
A squirrel scurried in the door. "Get back here, i must disect you!" Raine cried running through the door after it. Raine followed the squirrel into the open basement door. Lloyd and Genis heard her body falling down the stairs. "Quick!" Genis cried. Lloyd dashd over to the door shut it and locked it. "Shell probly just get out the basement window, oh well, that wont be a while. Poor, poor, squirrel..." 

Genis lifted his head up. "Do you smell something?" Lloyd and Genis followed the smell and ended up in the kitchen. Colette was standing in the middle of the floor holding a glass of orange juice. "YAAAAAY! Look what i got you Lloydie!" Half the kitchen was in flames. "What he hell COLETTE!! How did the kitchen catch on fire when you were just getting a glass of orange juice?!" Colette put her finger on her head. "I dont exactly know..." Genis casted spread and put the fire out. "Unbelieveable, your a total idiot..." "YAAAAAY!" Colette threw her hands into the air, the glass went crashing into the nearest window.

Zelos came in the kitchen door. He was only wearing a pink pair of womens lingerie. Genis and Lloyd gagged. While colette was writing "Colette plus Lloydie" on the ceiling with very horrible 3 year old handwriting.

"Wow, that was one of the best nights ever. I got laid about 52 times..." Genis and Lloyd started gagging even more. Colette flew down from the ceiling. "Zelos, what does laid mean?"

Genis threw a random apple at Zelos's head. "Colette! Theres a pair of Lloyds boxers outside!" "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Colette flew outside at lightspeed. "We do not need an explanation, espiecially from Zelos..."

Pronyma hovered in the door. "What are all you idiots doing. What is THE idiot doing?" She said looking out towards Colette furiously flying around the yard. "Looking for Lloyds boxers..." "Outside?" "Yes"

Pronyma made a fake cough. "Anyway, guess what?" "You have AIDs?" Lloyd said with a questioning look on his face." No, you idiot. Thats Rodyle. AHEM Your one and truly, Pronyma, which is me, won...The Drag of the Year Award!!!" Pronyma clapped her/his hands together and started doing a booty dance. "IT BURNS!" Genis cried covering his eyes and running out of the room. "Hmmm, entertaining...but your not my type." Zelos said looking Pronyma up and down. Genis jumped on the couch and turned on the tv. There was a news reporter standing by a burning building. "That building looks like the one down the street..."

The reporter started talking. "Just a minute ago this building caught mysteriously on fire. The police are looking for the cause right now." A blonde haired girl with wings flew up to her. "Have you seen Lloydies boxers?!" The reporter made a look at her like 'WTF' Colettes face turned to the camera. "OHMYGOD! AM I ON TV?!" She grabbed the camera and put it up to her face. The camera man started wrestling with her to get it back. "LLOYDIE! HI LLOYDIE! CAN YOU SEE ME? WHERE ARE YOUR BOXERS?" There was a loud crack and the screen sizzeled up going black and white. Genis stared in disbelief. "Ok, if police come. We dont know her." "Yeah..." Lloyd agreed. "Or better yet, Raine was in on it." "Perfect."

There was a puff of smoke in front of the tv. Pronyma was hoevering in front of them when it cleared. "I...am a man." "Duh." Genis said. "I always love making an appearence like that..." Pronyma stated. "By the way, your dads getting married tomorrow Lloyd." Lloyd got a big stupid grin on his face. "YES, im going to have a mom. Im the happiest boy alive." Genis sweatdropped. "Your new moms going to be Yuan...oh joy..." He said with a sarcastic tone. "Kratos said you going to be his best man. Botta is going to be Yuans. Anyway, i have to go. I dont want to catch the idiot disease." Pronyma zoomed up in the air, sadly hitting the ceiling again. "Heshe calls us idiots...Lloyd help me with this" They picked up pronymas body and put it in the closet. 

Sheena burst into the front door folloed by corrine. "Lloyd, Genis, guess what? I just caught Trojan! The summon spirit of se-" Corrine interuppted her. "Um Sheena, maybe you shouldnt say that..." "Oh, um yeah...of love...yes, the summon spirit of love...I cant wait to show Regal! Heh heh heh..." Sheena went back out the door. "WOW, maybe Sheena can show us the summon of spirit of love sometime to Genis" "Um...yeah...sure...love...uh huh...Lloyd, your not that smart either..."

Zelos ran into the room and grabbed Lloyd. "Come on! We have to get you dressed for your fathers wedding tomorrow!"

Day 3

Genis woke up to a loud sound. He rubbed his eyes and went down stairs. He found Colette in fetal position rocking back and fourth in the kitchen. She had broken through the kitchen window. "Cant...find...Lloydies...boxers..."

Genis put his hand on his head. "Youve got to be kidding me..." Suddenly the basement door swung open. Raine stomped out in a pink moomoo. "Who disturbed my beauty rest?!" Genis sweatdropped. "Uh oh...um...Raine theres a...new...species of mutated...squirrel? Yeah, of squirrel out in the yard."

"WHAT?! Why didnt you tell me earlier?!" Raine ran over and jumped out the already broken window. Colette suddenly came over and grabbed Genis by his shirt. "WHERE ARE LLOYDIES BOXERS?!" "Um...well...i think...they might have been stolen...by...Chocolat." "WHAT?! DAM YOU CHOCLATE!" Colette flew through the room and went out the window in another room. "Im not paying for those..."

Zelos came out of his room with only a pink thong on and walked up to Genis. "Whats going on?" "OhMYGOD! Does it hurt you to put on some clothes?!" Genis said covering his eyes. "Clothes cover too much. I even asked yesterday if everyone could come to the wedding in their birthday suits. For some reason they didnt like that idea too much. What spoilsports. Anyway, i better go start getting ready."

Genis went out to the living room and started watching tv. The hallway closet opened and Pronyma fell out. "Why was i sleeping in the closet? And why does my head feel like it did that time when i went to that guys gone wild party?" Pronyma got up and rubbed his head. Then she walked out the door.

"Hi genis." Genis turned. "Hi Lloy-" Genis observed Lloyd for a second. "What the hell are you wearing?!" Lloyd had on a pink button shirt with a very very very short pink skirt. Their were also two pink bows in his hair. And he had on rose red lipstick. "This is what im wearing to my dads wedding. Zelos said i looked great." "Heh heh heh...of course he would...Lloyd, go take all that stuff off and ill show you what to wear. And from now on, stay away from Zelos." As Lloyd left Presea walked in. "Hello..." "Hi" She sat down and started watching tv. "You wont get away from me this time!" THey both looked out the window and saw Raine chasing a squirrel around the driveway. "Must...resist...killing...small...animal..." Presea said slowly standing up. "Must...resist...urge...to...kill...myself..." Genis exlclaimed. Presea ran out the door. "Why is everyone around here so strange..."

Lloyd walked into the living room. Genis got up."Ok, well...Lloyd...why arnt you wearing any clothes..." "You told me to take those other ones off." "Lloyd! I ment...nevermind...just go get some clothes on. Maybe there is such thing as the idiot disease..." Genis sighed. 

Day 4

Genis and Lloyd walked into the chapel. Lloyd was dressed in a tuxedo, thankfully Colette didnt see him yet, or shed think it was their wedding. After Genis sat down Lloyd went up to the front to talk to his father. 

Kratos came over to Genis. "Could you be the preacher?" "Say what?" "Could you be the preacher. I think Mithos abducted him." "Ummm...why me?" "Cuz your the only one in here with an iq of...well, its bigger then anyone elses in here." Raine came running through the chapel doors in a white dress chasing a dog. "How dare you pee on me leg!" "Thats for sure..." Kratos muttered. Colette flew through the windows that were the chapels roof. "NOOOOOOOO! TACO! DONT HURT HIM!!!!" Then she started chasing Raine. "Um...hold on a sec." Genis ran over to Chocolat who was sitting in the corner. "Can you preach for them, here, ill give you a paper with all the words." "oh no you didnt. Chocolat dont work for no money. See, everyone think chocolat is a cheap ho, but Chocolat is a Ho, theres nothing cheap about Chocolat." "...Um...ill give you 5 bucks. And if you talk in that voice, il slap you." "ok."

As Genis was going back to his seat he almost ran into Zelos who was wearing nothing but a Speedo. "WHAT THE HELL!" Zelos leaned down to Genis. "Sorry, your not old enough to have some of this." He slapped his own rear. "Ewwwwww. Freak." Genis went back to his seat.

After everyone was seated Kratos stood in front of the preachers deskthing. "Before we start, would anyone like to say a few words or perform a song. "Oh! Oh! I would." Zelos ran up and grabbed the microphone out of kratos's hands. "Ahem." Zelos started swinging his hips around. "Dont you wish your boyfriend was hot like me. Dont you wish your boyfriend was a beast like me. Dont ya." "Pshh. I could have done better." Pronyma stated.

Colette came up to Genis. "Genis, can you help me. I want to sing a song but i dont know the words. It goes something like 'I wish i was your lover' i want to sing it to Lloyd." "...Ew. Um, how about...the little teapot song instead?" "YAAAAY! I LOVE THAT SONG!" "Ok... here." Genis wrote down some words and handed her the paper. Colette got up on stage. "I will now sing the Little Teapot song. Im a little pothead, blonde and gay..." Genis started laughing uncontrollably in his seat.

Yggydrasil appeared in the front of the pews. "I...am a man." Zelos yelled at him. "No your not!" Pronyma got up and btch slapped Yggdrasil. "Thats my line." Yggdrasill turned back into Mithos and ran out of the chapel crying. Kratos stated that he wanted to perform a song for Yuan. "Isnt he lovely. Isnt he beautiful. Isnt he precious. isnt he wonderful." Genis thought it was actually kind of touching.

"Now lets get started with the wedding." Kratos stated getting in his place. Yuan came up with Botta by his side. Lloyd at Kratos's. Chocolat in a black robe with a book in her hands. The paper was in between the books pages.

Suddenly Mithos, in a pick dress, with a white basket, came skipping up in the middle of the pews throwing rice everywhere. "Ow my eye." Pronyma said holding her eye. "Mithos, your supposed to throw rice after the wedding, you throw flowers at the beginning, stupid." Genis said. Mithos gave everyone the finger then ran out of the church. "Colette, he stole Lloyds boxers." Genis said pointing towards Mithos. "WHAT?!" Colette zoomed out of the church. You could hear Mithos screaming like a little girl. 


End file.
